It’s been a while since I’ve dedicated a whole post to a single manga. So you know it’s about to go down. But before I take you down this dangerous path in dark romance here is a list of trigger warnings.
This manga includes the following triggers:
- Child Abandonment
- Parental Abuse
- Sick Family
- Emotional Abuse
If any of the above mentioned can affect you mental health I wouldn’t suggest reading this manga.
I don’t know where to begin.
Hosoo lived to take care of his younger sister’s medical bills. Everything he did was for her and his adopted mother. Even though said adopted mother hated him. She treated him horribly. While I wanted Hosoo to walk away from all of them, I could see why he did whatever he could to be allowed to stay. Hosoo grew up in an orphanage. He was constantly taken and then returned when he no longer serves a purpose to the families that said they’d be his forever home. Hosoo just wanted to belong. I understood that, but it didn’t stop me from wanting to slap his mama.
Esau is a famous celebrity who also happened to be abandoned by his mother. I believe his mother was some sort of pimp or ran a brothel. It’s not really clarified, but she’s clearly selling herself and trying to sell her children. Esau most definitely has mental health issues. He’s a bit of an asshole, but it’s more so because he hides his true self away from everyone.
Our two main characters meet through a mutual friend who asks for Hosoo’s help. He’s to hide Esau away from the media until Esau’s mother’s latest scheme blows over. There is an immediate attraction on Hosoo’s end. Esau is a good-looking man and has no qualms about using the infatuation from both genders to his advantage
Hosoo is determined to not admit his attraction because Esau’s going to leave eventually. The problems arise when Esau becomes attracted to Hosoo. It’s hard to fight your feelings when the person who’s garnered your affections feels the same way. Eventually, they come together, but nobody seems to want the two of them to be happy.
Chaos ensues in multiple forms revealing truths and connections neither saw coming.
It was hard to tell if they’d stay together or they’d break up for good throughout the manga. Both characters have many trauma and mental health issues that have been ignored for way too long. Esau has a panic attack every time he sees his mother. Hosoo shuts down emotionally if he even thinks someone is going to abandon him.
Still, I was rooting for these boys. I wanted them happy and in love (with each other). Even though some moments of their relationship seem toxic. Esau always tries to manipulate Hosoo into staying with him (though he doesn’t have to). He doesn’t really take no when it comes to sex with Hosoo. Hosoo feels like he always has to appease Esau’s temperamental personality. They both have unhealthy attachments to each other, which leads to some interesting situations.
This story isn’t without its faults, and someone else (maybe you) might not be able to stomach some of the things that take place even if you don’t have trigger warnings. Nor am I agreeing with this kind of relationship, but who am I to judge who other sleep with. Nobody is perfect. Most people carrying around baggage and trauma that they don’t even know they have.
I wouldn’t claim this as a beautiful love story, but I find it realistic. This is very much a tale of two broken people coming together and helping each other tape up the cracks just by existing.
Besides, who says there’s only one way to love?